Friday...

I freaked out on blogger yesterday. I wrote two very long posts and they both somehow ended up erasing as I was formatting.... then seconds after the letters deleted, blogger saved the new draft as blank.

I almost cried.... lie. I almost put my fist through my laptop screen.

Yesterday was hard. I told two people I work with about my b/p tendancies. One was my boss and he pretty much knew already.

Why did I do it? I don't know. Part of me is fed up of looking at a plate of food and either going overboard or refusing to eat at all. I want to be lean and fit. Aaron, the new trainer, has given me a diet. I just need to follow it.

Today was a fail on that but a success this evening. I ate chocolate raisins and then tried to purge... mostly water came up. I did however make the quinoa and had salmon and veggies for dinner after a good workout.

I was 150 this morning, but 149.5 now. I need to follow this. I need to do this. A month. I can make it a month. Drop 10lbs of fat, get leaner. Give it a try. 135 doing it the right way instead of the last 6 months of failing to do it the wrong way?

Tomorrow is the church's garage sale and I'm there at 9am. Leave the house by 8:30am. I wanted to run but I don't know if I'll have time. I have to be up at 7am to run, and then only go for 30 min. I may do it, just as a trial. Go to the gym after the garage sale. I've got my food prepped so I can try to follow the diet. I need to go buy a bunch of stuff too. Fish, and chicken being the big ones, and more quinoa.

I get a cheat day. I may make it Sundays. I may eat chocolate raisins.....